Things I’ve Taken Away from My Toddler Today (And Why)

      Object                                               Reason for Confiscation               

  • Empty coffee container                  Standing on the top. Logrolling.
  • Rolling pin                                     Putting it in her mouth. Refusing to remove it from her mouth. 
  • Dry pasta                                       Sprinkling it over the kitchen floor, fairy dust style.
  • Armchair (closed via ottoman)       Standing/jumping on (very proudly).
  • Plastic shopping bag                      Attempting to put on head.
  • Reusable shopping bag                  ”    ” (forbidden due to the scary bacteria I’m told coats the inside)
  • My hairbrush                                  Throwing, boomerang-style, across the room
  • Dryer sheet                                    Attempting to wash face with it   
  • Cup/bowl/spoon/fork                     Banging punk-rock-drummer style on the high chair tray (new vocab this vacation: bang bang bang! Dad was doing demo and installing insulation in the attic…)

*thanks to Pat for inspiring this post!

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